Posted in Anxiety, Autumn, Foot injury, Panic attack, Recovery, Reflection, Well-being

I’m finally done with the foot injury but that’s not all…

After almost 9 months I’m so happy to say that I had my last physiotherapy session this week and if all goes well, it was really last one for the plantar plate injury. 🙂

It still surprises me it took this long but somehow the months went by, slowly, one day after another and there were definitely many good and bad days. Now the restrictions of moving are gone and I can finally slowly do everything with baby steps. I haven’t been running or jumping at all since last December so I have to start with those really carefully.

There they are, my healthy feet at the gym 🙂

Even though my feet are now fully on track to feeling normal again, there are other health concerns that came as a result of this year being so rough due to the plantar plate injury. I’m still surprised how much of an effect the injury had on me.

During summer I started to walk much more and to enjoy again a more active life. Our summer holiday was spent driving around Finland and exploring areas we hadn’t been to before. It was lovely. 🙂

Summer nights in Finland. ❤ This pic was taken in July at around 11pm.

Then I caught a very ordinary cold at the end of July. It was nothing special, except that it infected my ear and even worse it apparently spread to my inner ear and caused an infection to my balance nerve. The infection lasted for a few weeks and I suffered a lot from all-day vertigo and dizziness. The constant feeling of seasickness then caused my already tense neck to stiffen even more, and so I am now also diagnosed with a tension neck.

Tension neck can unfortunately also cause dizziness so basically it prolongs my symptoms. For over month now I’ve been feeling tired and dizzy for various reasons: first the inner ear infection/vestibular neuritis and tension neck and now also panic attacks. I’m so ready to be done with this unlucky year. 🙂

Panic attacks are a new, scary thing for me and I’m now seeing my psychotherapist to help work me through the panic attacks and anxiety around them. I think she explained it well that the panic attacks are a clear sign that my inner resources are being spent too quickly with all the ailments I’ve had this year. First the whole ordeal with my feet being injured for most of this year, then the month of dizziness and the feeling of being again ill and again away from “normal life”, it takes its toll on anyone. Even though I know that this year has been rough, my personality just makes me go forward and forget to pace myself when recovering. I’ve been just pushing myself with getting back on track with my life with the mentality of giving it all of my 100% even though I’ve been getting by with perhaps only 50% of my usual energy.

One ailment is done (the plantar plate tear) and now it’s back to focusing on recovery with a bit of a different theme this time. I need to slow down and go through my anxieties that have stacked over the course of this year. And of course I need to resume exercising both to help my feet regain more strength and flexibility, but also to help my tension neck go away. Once the dizziness stops, I think I will be able to get rid of the panic attacks too or at least they will become less powerful. This is how I hope it will go. It feels scary and I’m constantly anxious about when can I be my normal self again, but I have to try to be optimistic and again take it one day at a time. I need to be mindful of the pressure I put on myself and learn some healthy selfishness when I start to learn how to put myself first for a change. 🙂

Meanwhile I will continue with the reading challenge and enjoying the early autumn season. ❤

Author:

I love books, games and the coziness of our house (currently it's the kingdom of me and my husband). My work in a game studio as a Senior HR Specialist keeps me busy and social, but I am an introvert in my core. Navigating life between my very social work and my introvert, less social personality can be tricky and it goes hand in hand with my interest in overall personal well-being.

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